Since my blog about beginning my journey from the driven corporate laboratory manager to the top of a sacred mountain in the centre of the Island of the Gods, I have hummed and haa-ed about getting into the next chapters. Wow – that’s an old term!
It seems that I can get an out-line of the next steps in the journey. The chapters have great titles like “Breakfast in Paris”, “Hitting the F…-it Button”, “Mamma Mia”, “Samothraki Mysteries”, “Take the Key to Saint Joseph”, “Messenger of the Crystal Skull”, “Planning my Freedom”, “Journey to the Spiritual Mountain”, “Transplanted like Rice” and “Siwa Sakti, keeping the balance”. They all feel deeply personal, and my efforts to procrastinate are impressing even me, but still they are not getting written.
Actually writing the titles down like that makes me want to hear them as well! Yes, of course, I will be listening to how I tell this story! We all tell our stories differently for each audience, for the particular emphasis they want to hear, or that we want to tell. This time I am going to be telling my spirit journey, not just my human journey – that is a huge difference. My knowing is that these are not the same. If the focus is only on my human story, then that could be cathartic, but what’s the point? I already am comfortable that I am perfectly imperfect, like everyone else on this great adventure, we call life... What I want is a deeper sense of the journey that my soul has taken in this lifetime, and others, and why...
In the old days, I would have just pushed myself to complete this 15 day challenge in the strictest sense, because feeling good about myself was wrapped up in being a high achiever. Everyone around me would have had to suffer my antics as I pushed to get it done! Now I have a gentler, more balanced view on life. I know that if I really want to tell this story, and I have checked that I am not doing it to bolster my ego, I must trust, and then it will flow effortlessly.
Apparently it was the Greek Philosopher Socrates who said “I know that I know nothing”. On this journey, I know enough to know that I have a long way to go.
I got such great feedback from the first three blogs. I am grateful that you were all so kind and supportive particularly with the third one that got way more personal. It seems that this writing thing may actually continue. So, I have taken a few days to conjugate on what is my purpose in writing this blog/story/book?
I hope that perhaps my ramblings can serve as an encouragement to follow your own feet, take your own steps along your own path. Your path will twist and turn like mine, appear to stop, and even at times go backwards. But I have learnt that sometimes the best step forward is a step backwards. I have also come to accept that my mind is chaordic – you know - where you let it drift out into chaos to play, and then bring it back to order. I can’t promise that any of the other chapters will ever get written, but I can promise that I will continue to lead a full expansive life and feed you snippets.